I am at a loss for words today, to describe this incredibly crappy feelings I have.
To all the family and friends that supported, volunteered and donated to make the KAMI group an awesome success...I sincerely thank you. And I don't know where and how to begin to tell you that there officially is no longer a KAMI group.
Sadness. Disgust. Regret. Disrespect.
These words can't begin to describe the overwhelming hurt and sickness I feel today.
I have debated and battled with my self conscience about writing this post, for months. But after today, I felt I needed to share.
When we decided to move to Minnesota, leaving behind the KAMI group was the hardest decision. And I battled with how to handle it. I tried everything to keep myself a part of the organization and keep tabs. I wanted to make sure my goals and visions were still being upheld by the group of individuals left to administrate it. And to make sure all of the money, we all worked so hard to earn for families, was used properly. Sadly, I was not seen as a leader anymore, since I wasn't being seen in person. None of my decisions, ideas or suggestions were being considered or used. I was getting personally attacked on my motives and morals. People, I thought were friends and good people, accused me of creating the organization with ONLY my needs in mind.
In October, I learned that these people wanted to call the organization something else. They said it was too hard for them to explain what KAMI stood for. Because Kamalee was not their child. I found this completely insane. They didn't like that I named the organization after my child. And supposedly they were offended that I would do that. Although, it didn't keep them from attending events or requesting benefits.
I explained that so many organizations/companies name themselves after somebody...because that was their inspiration for starting it; like COLE, very popular in South Dakota, or Susan G. Comes 3day, known on a national level. To which they replied, they don't like those programs either. Convenient. Anyway, I told my side and urged them that I really wanted the group to keep it's name. In fact, that was the only request I had, when I left. And it turns out that this was their first order of business to accomplish.
Because they were not backing down, I tried everything in my power to turn the whole thing back over to myself until I could plan other arrangements. I spent 4 years working alone and very hard to create the KAMI group. Everything from bank accounts, taxes, legalities, etc. I took care of. When we did our first Buddy Walk and suddenly had $10,000+, I decided I needed to create a Board of Directors to decide the appropriate and fair way to use that money. I was trying to protect myself and all of the people who gave money to the group. In hindsight, I apparently chose the wrong people for this. I spoke with a lawyer and because of the board, I allowed myself to lose the "power" so to speak. And unfortunately I no longer had say over my own actions. Legally, I couldn't stop them from undoing everything I started. So, at the end of the year, I resigned from all duties and dealing with the group. I explained that, while hoping them success, I couldn't help them erase everything related to KAMI. I addressed the two individuals that were to take shared responsibility and again pleaded to keep the name.
I never heard anything back.
Today, they announced a new name. I won't be sharing it.
To be honest, it is going to be totally confusing since there is already an organization in Ohio with the same name.
The fact that the KAMI group is officially gone kills me. All of my hard work and support of my family is gone. I am so sorry to all of the people that had a hand in helping KAMI grow. I will never forget what you all did and I am so grateful.
I don't write this to dis-promote the new-named organization. I hope success...because of the kids it can benefit. But I just wanted to share my truth, as most of this happened in the confines of homes, etc. And I have a great understanding of how the Watertown Community works. Rumors will start and I am sure that my name will come out dirty. And the KAMI group will be like it never existed. I wish circumstances were different. Because now, almost 4 years of my work and family support has slipped out of my hands and soon out of people's lives.
- p.s. The new logo also uses part of the logo from the KAMI group, without permission, of course.
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